Turkey V

I think there is something to be said about the self-indulgentness of vacationing. I understand that I happen to live in a country that allows a ridiculous amount of freedom to travel without restrictions, that I happen to be in circumstances that allow me to have the time and the money to travel, and that there are many of millions of people that will never stray far from their place of birth. I wonder if I may have passed some sort of threshold to 'see the world'.
This is doubtful. What I suspect is more likely is the 'purposefulness' of travel. It has been a very long time since I have travelled solely for the purpose of traveling alone. Not for conferences, or for edification of the saints, or for visiting friends who work in far-flung areas doing Very Important Work, or for participating in real, tangible work to help people - those have been the only reasons for my traveling over the past decade overseas to exotic locales.
And so, for 'just' traveling, I find it paradoxically not very satisfying. Ending up on the carousel of the tourist track, of going where everyone else is going, and seeing what everyone else is seeing, seems like a never-ending self-indulgent funfest. Spending so much time within the tourist infrastructure is stifling - you don't have a chance to develop culture shock, because you don't see many people who aren't other tourists, or nationals working for the tourism industry. You move within bubbles of ex-pats, all moving like sheep to the same destinations to gawk at the same things.
The only tangential interaction was staying with some Kurdish couchsurfers, and talking to them about their experiences of being Kurdish in Turkey. Having to struggle to understand their reality and their history was the only mentally challenging and demanding thing that I had to do the whole time. But with that came a slightly deeper understanding of the makeup of this country, of where it will go. It gave me context for the PKK bomb that went off in Istanbul, a few days after we left that city. It helps form what I understand of their upcoming elections next week. No tour guide, nor Lonely Planet, nor tourism travel board can ever give a glimpse of that side of a country's face...