Vows, deeply knotted and embedded tightly

I suspect it's probably a bit normal to get a bit of the jitters before the big day, wondering if it's the right decision, and whether you have the constitution to persevere and work and love, even when it's really hard and you don't feel like it, for multiple decades. And this is even if, deep in your heart of hearts, you already know it to be true. And this is even when you know that the big day is just the beginning of a long and adventurous journey, that it hardly registers as a blip on the rollicking, rolling waves of life.
I suppose also that God is kind of funny in how He'll give you a smack upside the head every once in a while to remind you of things that you know to be fundamentally true, but just so that He brings it right back up to the surface again, to remind you. And not too hard, just barely enough for you to handle, but definitely obvious enough that it is hard to miss.
Kind of like this trip to the ICU. I'm thankful that it was a medical smack upside the head; I could speak their language, and gauge better the severity of the calamity, and weigh it more rationally than if it was, say, a hostage-taking scenario (Christ have mercy upon us). I am thankful that it happened here and not there. I am thankful that there was no need for intubation and ventilation; I'm not sure how I could have handled intubation. I am thankful that mostly peripheral lines were sufficient for what needed to be done, and I could not perceive the central line. I am thankful for being able to interpret, and have interpreters walking alongside me, as to what was happening. I am thankful for the homecoming and the slow recuperation.
What it did, though, was bring into stark relief some of the cliches that we speak of: the reality of 'in sickness and in health', the ephemeral nature of life itself, that love can conquer all, even beyond the grave. Some of this helped alleviate my fears, though not totally. But it helped confirm for me, yes, I can. Yes, I will. Yes, I do.